Dukhtar

Now here is a revolution I see happening in the current generation. Whilst we see intolerance increasing by the day, we also see people voicing their opinions freely. And by people, I majorly mean women. The kind of revolution which is taking place in a technologically dominated era, I do see women standing up for their rights in various ways. 

Until ten years ago, women were told to not act in films after they got married or were forced to take motherly roles after the age of thirty. Quite ridiculous isn’t it? Not like the picture has changed 180 degrees today, but voicing opinions and social media surely has taken its due course to change the perception about women actors and stories.

Us as an audience have majorly watched stories that have an urban touch, the city life, and how people live with privilege. Yes, I do mention privilege here because I personally believe that city people have far more advantages to earning income than those living in rural areas.

That is why, we need more filmmakers who will write scripts majorly based on rural development, its society and societal construct.

On one such note; I recently had a chance to watch a Pakistani movie. I kid you not, I have become a die-hard fan of Pakistani drama shows. They are thoroughly engaging, have female directors, and show headstrong women who want to prove their potential not just to society, but to themselves as women surrounded by constant misogyny.

The pandemic hit us all and gave me an opportunity on a personal level to explore the magic of cinema. In this course of time, I decided to prepare a small basket of art / experimental feature films that don’t fit our traditional mainstream cinema definition. These films challenge and question our past, present and future. These films ask us to question our beliefs, whether they are fair or if we are being partial? Following up, is the introspection of our thoughts, which just like you all, I have done in these past few months. The only difference that lies between you and me is that my medium of introspection has been films which have majorly shaped my personality and life since the lockdown began.

I was introduced to a wide area of experimental art and feature films during this period. That has made me truly wonder whether I still resonate with my past self or have really changed. There is just so much to unlearn is what I have felt in the past few months. One of the most recent instances where I watched a movie of impact has been ‘Dukhtar’. 

The first thought to pop up in my mind was the meaning behind this word, which is Urdu. Before asking Google what it meant, I asked my brain to create a meaning of my own, which concluded to sadness. Well, that was a failed attempt, but at least I tried, haha.

Dukhtar meaning Daughter is a ninety-three minutes feature film; directed, produced, and written by Afia Nathaniel. Afia originally happens to be from Lahore and is currently based in the United States. The minute I saw the poster for the very first time, I knew that I have to watch this film with my full attention. And, then I picked out a fine Sunday with a glass of wine and started watching it.

Afia’s film takes us through the rigid, rough plains of Hunza, Gilgit and Baltistan to a small part of the walled city of Lahore, which I have read so much about, and always felt fascinated with. Yet again, through the script, she challenges the patriarchy residing in the villages of Pakistan through the eyes of two girls; Allah Rakhi(Samiya Mumtaz) and her daughter Zainab (Saleha Aref).

Allah Rakhi’s character though initially what feels like soft as a flower, and not much outspoken, yet very caring but later changing her course to being fierce as a storm is a great example of how to not judge books by their cover.

Throughout the movie, they struggle to find their place which is dominated by the men of the village, who for their own benefit and gain want the 10-year-old Zainab married off to their enemy as an alliance to a much older man.

In fear of seeing how Zainab's life can be similar to Allah Rakhi’s, they both flee from the village and end up meeting Sohail ( Mohib Mirza) on the way, who is a truck driver. Sohail’s truck is something I’d love to own someday too, hahaha. As the saying goes that when the universe closes one door, it opens another; Sohail truly shows up as a messiah amidst the widespread raw land of Baltistan (truly beautiful and daunting at the same time).

Afia through her work also shows us the real side of how the male ego works, and how women have always ended up being the only sufferers and victims of this violence and fragile ego. For a girl like Allah Rakhi, her daughter means everything to her. And by setting her free from this odd marriage which is a prison if you ask me, she is setting an ideal example for her daughter too. With the intention that when she grows up someday, she will show fierce courage and bravery to fight patriarchy and societal norms, all written by men. Dukhtar is an ode to all those women who continue to fight their battles and prove their worth as women, especially in the rural areas where women are questioned about their worth constantly. Where women constantly have to battle wars with men who don't believe in equality. Where women seek refuge in those men who believe that humanity wins above all. Where women believe in a positive tomorrow and a hope that they’ll be treated with much-deserved dignity and respect. 

Like I said earlier, Afia makes us question what we believe in and what our fight is against, especially those with privilege who can help the undermined. Would we truly ever be able to give a safe world to our women? I don’t know the answer to this, but the much-needed fight continues and grows larger each passing day. For those who need some courage and believe in compassion, this film is truly for them to watch.

Womanhood, Women this and Women that

My research on ‘feminism’ took me to understand what being a woman truly means. I recently had a conversation with a very close friend about femininity and the true meaning of feminism in the twenty-first century, how its meaning has been falsely narrated and taken advantage of by many. Lockdown made us all sit inside our homes, and have conversations with our families. When I always say that I come from a very unusual family background, it usually means that my parents fit into the ‘cool' parents definition of brown people. Whilst we speak openly of dating men, heartbreaks, cultures, religion, racism, and whatnot. We also have discussed feminism many times. 

One of the greatest perks of being a woman of this age for me is that I can raise my voice against injustice. To realize it, I had to go back and read certain written records and research on how women have been treated by the patriarchy and society. We have generations of women who have been victims of endless suffering by the male gaze. And, I personally feel that women are underappreciated for the work they do. If you want me to go in the basics, then let’s start with them giving birth to a whole new life.  When a man (supposedly then my to-be forever) in his early twenties tells me that a woman is born only to give birth and take care of the household, that is where I have a problem. It started raising questions in my mind when I was firmly told this by someone whom I admired. Do you see the complexity of his thoughts?

Dr. Anandi Bai Joshi was the first female to cross lands and become a doctor of western medicine. A society that turned against women having education, did not celebrate her courage and outcasted her. Graduating with her were Sabat Islambouli from Syria and Keiko Okami from Japan who were the first female doctors of their respective countries too, I am speaking of the early fifties. It’s in our good stars to thank Dr. Joshi for her contribution and for paving the way for other women. She set a prime example of what all women can do. And, I personally feel that there is nothing that a woman cannot do. This brings me to my next and all-time favorite example; Anne Frank. We all have been well acquainted with her. Most people I correspond with are well aware of why she is so popular among the crowd. Yes, the Holocaust took place during the Second World War, and Anne was one of the many victims who perished in Auschwitz-Birkenau. Then how did a fifteen-year-old girl become a ray of hope for other women and stays relevant till today? Where did she find that courage? What gave her hope? I always feel grateful that her father Otto Frank published her diary, and I kid you not, this diary since then has become a major example of motivation for many. Anne’s thought process amazes me, her conscience at such a young age was crystal clear.

(Top L to R): Jameela Jamil, Keiko Okami, Mira Nair, Amma Asante, Sabat Islambouli
(Bottom L to R): Homai Vyarawalla, Jane Austen, Anne Frank, Anandi Bai Joshi, Charlotte Bronte

I do not have a problem with men, but I have a problem with them underestimating what women can do. I have a problem when they say, “Not all men”. I have a problem with casual sexism and infidelity jokes. I have a problem with toxic masculinity. I have a problem where a man makes a woman choose between him and her career. I have a problem with men saying that women cannot have a career and should learn kitchen work. Believe me, as much as I have met my fair share of toxic men; I also have befriended men of good conscience. Their clarity in what they want and how they support women astounds me. It is the bare minimum, yes, but I see the plight of most women around (including me), and I see a colossal change taking place for women’s rights. Almost every woman I’ve spoken with, or known, or is an acquaintance has been a subject of abuse of some or the other kind. 

I have a problem with people concluding that women are each other’s enemies. I am not okay with people telling me that the male gaze will stare and women need to dress ‘appropriately’. I have a problem with internalized misogyny where a woman is told that she is different than other women. Where women who do make-up are slut-shamed and women who don’t like make-up are called ‘real women’. Where women of a specific body type are body shamed casually and asked to gain/lose weight. Yikes, what does that even mean? Why do we have these many norms? Why have we validated them?

I see before me; these mighty women leaders, able administrators, powerful young girls who ruled dynasties. And, I do see a change happening. Is it because we should change with time? Is it the result of the #MeToo movement? Yes. I mean, I have been scared to write this out in the open for a very long time now, but I also understand that not everyone can have the same opinion as mine. But, that won’t stop me from writing what I truly feel. Because I feel truly empowered as a woman of this century when I can raise my voice against injustice, fighting for equal pay, and rights. Women can instead be each other’s allies and put an end to this. I see women empowering each other now and I am glad to be a part of this global community. And, before you jump on me, we women love it if men are a part of this big change too where they’d rather support this newfound freedom and independence we have. Join the bandwagon, we’d be more than happy to welcome you on board.

There was a time when not a single woman photographer existed in India. The world was on a brink of the second world war, and that’s when a mighty young woman entered. She was born in Gujarat to a Parsi-Zoroastrian family and was later married to Maneckshaw Vyarawalla. I am of course talking fondly of Homai Vyarawalla or as known to the common public; Dalda 13. She set an astonishing example of how a woman stood up amongst a majorly dominated industry by the males and became the first woman photo-journalist of India. Is that what gave me a boost of confidence too? 

Have you ever looked at your mother and imagined what your life would be without her existence? I mean, I cannot because I keep speaking about my family in all the interviews I have given (only a few lol), but I always make it a point to mention my mum who has stood tall like a giraffe and taught me to be a better person every day. I did not like school and she never forced me to go, I attended classes just for the sake of it. The number of efforts she has taken on me can never be written in words. Not to forget my loving father who has not treated me any differently for me being a girl but raised us both (my sister and I) to become strong and independent women. Believe me, everything is not hunky-dory as it sounds. There was a part of them that was scared back then when we chose unconventional careers, thinking if we’d make it out in the world. But I have seen them talk to others, I see them happy and proud, and that’s what is important at the end of the day.

I also feel empowered as a woman is because of my parents. They never stopped us from exploring and gaining knowledge, questioning the world and our beliefs. And, that, in my opinion, is very important. My mother’s contribution to our lives has changed our perspectives on how we look at other women too. The women whom I once thought of as my contemporaries have now become my allies. Most of them even have ended up being my close friends. And, that is a big change.

Speaking of cinema; I have been heavily influenced by Indie and women-centric films and shows— Parched, Monalisa Smile, Kahaani, Angry Indian Goddesses, Sex Education, and the recent one I became a die-hard fan of is The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. I remember how much I enjoyed watching films like Erin Brokovich and Freedom Writers. Oh, I tell you, women can do anything when they put their minds to it. There are women like Virginia Woolf, Jane Austen, Charlotte Bronte, and Amrita Pritam who inspire me to write better every day. By the way, you must get to know Jameela Jamil because she is that driving force who pushes me to do more for other women every single day.

As I type this, I let out a big sigh and stretch my arms up in the air, looking outside at my plants showering themselves with the sunlight at my window. I have recently begun to feel that writing is becoming a therapy for me, I feel freer after I pen my thoughts down. And as much important as this write-up is for me, it’s equally important that I feel acknowledged for my existence as a woman of this age. I am sure that the twenty-first century will bring a major revolution to the definition of what womanhood really is. Whilst I say this, I will now return to staring at my plants and try to paint them again. Auf Wiedersehen!

Unusual Rehke Toh Dekho

22 March, 2020

On my way to freedom…      

Believe me, I am unable to sleep every night just like you all, it was Friday the 20th of March, and this was the first time I actually didn’t leave my house for one whole week. I am going crazy. I think a lot, about everything. Sometimes it is truly a gift but sometimes it isn’t, trust me. I want to put an end to these negative thoughts, I have so much to do, so much hope that everything is going to be fine. Not a single day has passed where I have consoled at least one person in an entire day, they are freaked out to a point where they start saying things like, “Ah! No one will be alive.” This is when I have to stand up and be strong, but well, here we are. The repercussions are I cannot sleep at all, at night. My really close friend’s parents are out of town since Holi, they came back this morning.

It’s a Sunday, nationwide strike today to convey our gratitude to the people working non stop during this pandemic. At 10.20 am I get out of my bed but I don’t want to. I am currently reading two books; ‘A Book of Simple Life by Ruskin Bond’, don’t judge, this is my first book of Ruskin which I have started and now I feel bad I didn’t start it any sooner. The streets are surprisingly calm today, not a single horn is heard. I have kept my project bulletin board in front of me since the last whole week but somehow I find it difficult to concentrate. I hear loud noises from buildings around me, people chatting. For the first time in 15 years I am actually hearing songs and people laughing, clearly everyone is catching up with their family members. Some kids are still playing outside, ugh, so stupid, I know you probably want to play outside but cmon, this is just a matter of sometime I am letting it go, I come to my WFH office immediately, mornings give it a beautiful bright look since the sun enters and it's all fresh, I could use a bit of a fresh sight right now.

It’s my third break down since the quarantine. No, why would I lie pretending that I am strong about this? I have my bad phases too. But it’s a lot easier to sit in my office and feel things than to show it in front of Ma & Pa, they are already a little upset and concerned. Hence, I reach near my window, sobbing. My eyes are completely wet by now, I think I am just overwhelmed seeing the sun & trees in my backyard that I smile as well as I cry, and this feeling is relatively new hence I think I am unable to understand myself by now. The neighbours who usually are fighting and screaming loudly seem to have lowered their voice. I hear birds loudly today, my compound dogs barking strangely. Then they see me, run towards my window and are wondering why am I not petting them by now. 

I wonder about only one person all this while, maybe to make myself feel better and stop sulking. No, stop guessing lol. I am talking about Anne Frank guys :P

In fact, I think about Anne every single day since the self isolation period has started. I couldn’t help myself but to understand how she lived, her mood swings and that she had such a difficult time but to find the courage and still think at the end of the day that “Inspite of everything, I still believe that people are good at heart.” Where would you find this courage, Anne after everything you have been through? But her positive spirit keeps me going every single day. We have the liberty to go out to at least buy groceries, we can watch anything, speak to anybody we want to. Anne did not have those luxuries guys, so what are we cribbing about? I completely understand that situation is exactly the opposite of ideal but we all have to stick together by managing social distancing. You get me? I was supposed to attend my first Goan wedding this year of my ex colleague & mentor Maruska, but I don’t think I would be able to go anytime soon, Goa seems far. Oh, I just realised, I am writing a blog after so long, I don’t even remember the last time I opened pages on Mac and actually completed writing something, but I think it’s this exact soothing chirping of birds that is keeping me going every single day and giving me a push to write again. 

I am starting to actually understand what mom spoke about all these years. The importance of basic hygiene, not that I didn’t do it but as a kid I was pretty mischievous, haha. Our family is chill 90% of the time, we do argue, sometimes it turns into a heated argument too but that is a rare case. I had my worst fears in front of my eyes since the self isolation was announced; my house shouldn’t turn into a Big Boss House for crying out loud. That is the last thing I want. But surprisingly, today afternoon I found myself sitting with my little sister, Ma & Pa gossiping literally. I miss seeing my grandmas, I miss Pune. I miss Gaurav and Sky, all my memories with them are flashing in front of my eyes. History sessions and field tours with Krupali. Some random ass video calls with Aishwarya, Rahul and Vivek, planning trips with Ashwini, then there is Adi who is currently in Australia, Aakash, Farha & Shailesh in Goa, Dharma who took care of me in my Goa house rental, I miss my Rajasthan crew, so much. I miss my Goa so much. So damn much. The lush green streets, colourful Portuguese houses, me sitting in the verandah with music and my friends having wine, having a good time.

Do you realise? How many things you are grateful for? So many realisations every single day, the people I took for granted, the people whom I love immensely, the mistakes I did and lost people because of those, I am writing this with tears in my eyes. Maybe this is how it is supposed to be. The universe listens when you ask for something and it has taught me a lesson for life. We all need to slow down a little bit. Give ourselves time to heal from our pasts, our sorrows and just work for our own betterment end of the day. I practically opened my journal today which has tiny leaves and flowers I collect from time to time, they look pretty now and the faded colour adds more flavour to it. I make ginger tea, stand near my office window, look outside once again, watching the trees, the cool breeze. It’s surprising that the weather has become chill these days, maybe also because the pollution has reduced drastically. There are sparrows coming near my window every single day and sitting on the bars. 

Also thinking of making a few changes to my bedroom by the way. The current office will be turned into our bedroom & my office space will be shifted to my current bedroom. It’s a long process but I have finally started to implement the basic ideas. Maybe quarantine isn’t that bad after all. Haven’t seen my parents this relaxed in a very long time. They are now watching back to back old movies, yesterday at 2 am, mom comes smiling alright. That usually never happened but yesterday, surprised at her own actions she comes to me grinning widely and says, “Pa & I are watching back to back movies hahaha!”. I was shocked, I swear. I gave her a weird laugh and asked her to go back & enjoy her time. We had on the rocks whiskey at night. I can actually hear birds singing at night too. What is happening? Whenever I work in my office, I see my fairy lights & pins on it. Attached to the pins are some of my beautiful memories with people as well as my solo trips, my milestones, all of them remind me of my good times, my thought process during every situation. Then on the left shelf are some books I have decided to read since like forever, ugh.

 I finally started with one, maybe because I want to feel the nature more than ever, right now. I scratch my head, it’s 2.15 am now, I am drinking ginger tea again, feels good. I put my head out of the window, a cool breeze blows everywhere, it’s so calm & quiet, not a single vehicle in my vicinity. I do read news every single day to keep myself updated but I don’t freak out, on purpose. Listening to Lucky Ali’s O Sanam (apparently my new favourite song), I start writing whatever I feel, I am surprisingly so calm and content right now. By the way, Lucky Ali as my husband? Any day haan. I don’t mind. Now c’mon don’t laugh, please. 

I have also realised, people these days are easily giving up the hopes of surviving. Not a single day has passed when I haven’t spoken to someone who is going through an emotional breakdown, and these feelings are valid too, but crying all the time will make you vulnerable and dull. We don’t want that if we want to fight together against this. Right? Why’d you think I am reading books on nature and self evaluation? We have the time to do things we thought we did not have time for, start toh karo. Shuru nahi karoge toh how would you ever feel that you can actually do something else other than being online all the time? Kuch bhi karo. Cell phones ka use kam karo and do something productive. I might sound like a mom right now but what I am saying is valid. I have a friend who recently started reading books, and he already is feeling a lot better than before, I asked him yesterday if he is feeling good. He said, reading books was the best thing to do. Ever. Find what you like, except staying active on social media all day. Now what excuses can you have? 

Meanwhile, here are some pictures I thought you all see in this testing time :)
Hope you feel better. And if you don’t, I am always one text/email away.

reach2sanika@gmail.com

Hope you all feel better. Stay at home & stay safe. Sending all the positive vibes & love to everyone :) <3 

The Guernsey Literary & Potato Peel Pie Society

“The Guernsey Literary & Potato Peel Pie Society”

What did you think of when you read this? What in god’s name is this sentence? Well, believe me folks… the first time I read its name I had a small laugh too. Yes, it is quite mouthful. But it has been already said, don’t judge a book by its cover. I did underestimate it, until I saw the film myself. Let me give you a glimpse of this and let’s understand a little more; why do films like these need to come out more? Guernsey is an island near The United Kingdom on the English Channel which was once occupied by the Germans during World War II. I am doing research on Holocaust and World War II since last two years and maybe one of the reasons why this film holds a special place in my heart, unlike other romcoms (I do like romcoms as my sister says always “Sanika has watched all the British & American romcoms possible) Well, I can’t deny that possibility lol. This is how it starts…

Year 1941, Guernsey, Channel Islands, United Kingdom

Germany could never take over the United Kingdom except for the Channel Islands and during this occupation many people were the victims. Meet Juliet Ashton, an English writer from London and also meet her publisher, her oldest friend Sidney Adams (Matthew Goode). Juliet has lost her parents during the war and writes books by the name Izzy Bickerstaff. Their latest publication ‘Izzy Bickerstaff goes to war’ is being a hit, all thanks to Sidney and Stark publications's marketing. Juliet wants to write something different, for her own. Lily James who plays the role of Juliet has such a spark in her eyes throughout the film. She is happily in a relationship with an American bloke Mark Reynolds (Played by Glen Powell) who also happens to be a diplomat. Mark is head over heels for Juliet but whereas Juliet feels that she does love him but yet it is evident that she longs for something else, something more.

Enter Dawsey Adams (played by Michiel Huisman who is also known for his role in Game of Thrones as Daario Naharis). Dawsey writes a letter to Juliet informing her about an existence of a society called as, ‘The Guernsey Literary & Potato Peel Pie Society’ which is a reading book club and that they usually hold meetings on Fridays. So why does he write her a letter out of the blue? He came into the possession of her copy of ‘Essays of Elia’ and wants to know about where to find a bookshop in England to buy another book by the same author, Charles Lamb. Much to his surprise, Juliet sends another book by Lamb and his sister, Tales from Shakespeare in exchange for more information about the society and how it came into being.

Something fascinates Juliet and she wishes to write more about the society to publish it in the Newspaper and thus decides to visit Guernsey to get to know it all in person.

How well do you mend among people whom you have never met before? Juliet is someone just like you, me, us all. Longing for something. “ Do you suppose it’s possible for us to belong to someone before we have met them?” Juliet, an independent woman living in a place like London is unable to find a house because she doesn’t feel a sense of belonging anywhere she goes to. She has everything she wants but she realises eventually that what she desires is not really around. The film takes us through a beautiful nostalgia of how the 1940s could have been. One completely starts to believe that they were born in the 1940s. Times were hard and people were just getting used to the post war life, everything was a part of destruction by the SS forces and everyone was recovering. Piece by piece.

Juliet finally unable to resist, writes to Dawsey to visit Guernsey island herself and meet the society. She invites herself and while leaving for her journey something unexpected happens which she has mixed feelings about. Upon her arrival in Guernsey, Juliet attends the meeting of the Society where she is treated as a celebrity by the members: Dawsey Adams, Amelia Maugery (Penelope Wilton) , Isola Pribbey (Katherine Parkinson), Eben Ramsey (Tom Courtenay), and Eben's young grandson, Eli (Kit Connor). Juliet is told that Elizabeth (Jessica Brown Findlay), the founding member, is overseas which Juliet finds very suspicious. She slowly starts mixing with the members of the society getting to know its formation and origin as well as doubting where Elizabeth really is. I personally feel it is a great way to show someone willing to explore their new identities, and that Juliet realises eventually that she doesn’t belong to her previous life which is being a writer in London. A surprising element has also been added in the latter part of the film and I feel all of them have done a really great job in maintaining the essence of the characters. 

You start to convince yourself that this is not someone acting on camera but real people in front of you. Well, you cannot help but feel sympathetic towards them, especially Amelia and to some extent Juliet and Dawsey, in fact everyone had lost their loved ones in the war. The instant chemistry between Juliet & Dawsey is evidently seen throughout the film which is really adorable. While we understand the adulation of Juliet towards Dawsey, she is answerable to her fiancé on the other side and Sidney being her best friend understands her in all the ways possible. The Guernsey Literary & Potato Peel Pie Society is a well thought, simplified tale of a different kind of family which has come together in a very unusual situation. They might not be blood related but they care for each other like anything. I liked the character Isola in particular; she is a happy go lucky woman and has accepted the destiny and situation she is put into and never once complaints. Dawsey is a charming young man who has been into sorrow for a long time but takes life as an enjoyment living on a farm.

There is empathy, there is love, there is kindness, there is sorrow and there is a feeling of incompleteness among everyone trying to fit in the puzzle. I mean that’s what we all look for right? Trying to fit rightly in the puzzle. It is a tale of a woman on a road of self discovery, broadening her horizons and finding it difficult to live a mundane life in a city like London where she is drawn back to a small and simple lifestyle in a town called Guernsey. I guarantee you that you will like the film for its simplicity, performances and most importantly Juliet’s thirst for always questioning everything. We all have a Juliet somewhere within us, I am sure, who wishes to discover themselves. Am I right or Am I right? ;)

I hope you enjoy the film :)

Sushegaad!

                             PROLOGUE

Lost my appetite, wasn't quite feeling to write, had numerous thoughts on this one, bitter memories, felt low. I was clueless on what to write. I took one whole year to find the exact words on this one. Opened my Dashboard a million times and closed it. Couldn't find a reason to write it. Felt worthless, hopeless on life. I don't know what happened, I used to feel happy while writing everything here even when I knew everyone will read it. Goa taught me lessons in a million ways. Moving out of your comfort zone is NOT easy; handling battles in the industry, working professionalism, etiquettes, manners and habits, feeling homesick, facing a heart break in an unknown city, still working and ending the day watching a shitty Bollywood movie, partly crying. I have been through it all! Anyway, I hope you all shower me with love for this one, because this one is seriously special to me.

 This is to the people who fight against all the odds and stand up for themselves, who never give up and rise strong. To those, who stand out of their comfort zone. This one is for you all.

Do you know what Sushegad means? LAZY! Uh, yeah. Sushegad is a Konkani word for Lazy. Suits me so much you know. Goa had always been my dream destination. Who doesn't want to live in a place like Goa? Well we all had our own travel fantasies since childhood; and I am sure everyone wanted to be in Goa. As we grew up eventually; stress, responsibilities and work took a permanent place in our homes. Millions of group plans made for a vacation in Goa and cancelled. Ah, that face we make when a Goa plan is cancelled. Everyone knows that face lol!

It was 12th April, 2017. I was sitting at home one day; my god, the scorching heat every single day in Mumbai. You know how you get an empty feeling inside; you are doing a lot of things but then it hits you; the feeling of not being good enough. Such was my condition. I was looking for something/someone to work with since last one month. I had just finished my second year exams in History(Before you get all doubtful here; I did a diploma before, along with a few other courses so I was getting a late degree that's all). One fine day upon opening Facebook; I came across this status regarding a vacancy for an intern in Goa for consecutive three months. This post was posted by Mr. Sephi Bergerson. Let me introduce you to my boss, Sephi if you still haven't recognised him. Do you remember an article by Bored Panda; a few years ago about a photographer shooting an entire wedding in Rajasthan on an I Phone? Sephi is the man ;)
Here is the link: https://www.boredpanda.com/iphone-wedding-photography-sephi-bergerson-india/

So yes! That's how it started.
I went to Goa in 3 days. My work would start from Monday; which is 16th April, 2017. I couldn't even get a chance to tell my friends because suddenly there was so much work to do. Finding a place to stay, contact our friends in Goa, making sure everything was in place, ticket bookings and blah! I left for Goa on Saturday; such a tiresome journey I tell you! We reached and found a beautiful place to stay in Porvorim for a few days. But as I had to get my license till then; I moved to a hostel on a temporary basis. The name was Hopping Frog. My mom wasn't really happy at first with the idea of me living in a dormitory for three months alone. I stayed in Hopping Frog for a month. It was a nice place to stay but my luggage was so much that I had to move out soon in order to find a proper rented room for myself. So let me tell you a few honest things here; Goa as a tourism place is really good to go to. Go with your fellows, hang out with beers and food on the beach shacks and come back refreshed. But if you are an intern, obviously there is a limited amount of money involved so you have to save up a lot. A big thank you to Hopping Frog owners: Sonali & Mohit; Rashida, Sharon, Clyde, Tashi, Charles and Aakash for being really wonderful to me during my stay at Hopping Frog. I had thought that I am going to have a hard time making friends around but these people came at the right time.
If anyone wants to visit Goa and looking for a comfortable and amazing stay; please check Hopping Frog Hostel: http://www.hoppingfrog.in/ Sonali and Mohit will be happy to help you :)

                                                        View from my room

                   
                       You can prepare your own food or you can also order food there

                                      My first day in Goa

I had a few days to find a room for myself. We had really less contacts and a limited budget too so it was really difficult for me to find an affordable place in Assagao. Assagao is the Beverly Hills of Goa! Greenery and Flowers all around; gorgeous traditional Goan Portuguese houses mama mia! I casually searched on Google hoping I would find a place to stay and I did. I was almost in tears when I called the landlord of that place but we had a good talk and he invited me to check out the place, it was 5 minutes away from my current stay. For the next four months; my stay was going to be in Villa De Aluizio. The place is a beauty. Over the period of 4 months; the owner of the place Shailesh Dias and I became good friends. Shailesh, a very warmhearted gentleman. You can easily stay here with your group of friends or families. I made so many friends during my stay in the Villa. Shailesh, is a person who has a warm persona; very positive, he comes to check on you every day, has a wonderful smile. His wife is absolutely the cutest and we still are in touch.
I always recommend this place to all the people who ask me where to stay in Goa. 
The Address is: Socol Vaddo, Bouta Waddo, Assagao, Goa 403507.
Contact: 098676 17781

Exactly my kind of place!

A place where you are living, also matters on how the host treats you. I was treated like a family for the next 4 months. I guess Shailesh, you have seen me in all my phases than most people have! Lol! 

"You have a lot of potential Sanika. Go and paint the world RED!" Shailesh used to say that so many times. Eventually he became more like a mentor to me. I have cried so many times, I wanted to give up so many times and run back to Mumbai but I don't know what made me stay there. For a person like me; who is much of a talker, I need people around and Goa becomes completely opposite of it after 7 PM everyday. Like, it was hell for me after 7 PM, no one to talk to. "Do you let Sephi talk?" is what Shailesh used to ask me and we had a laugh about it. It felt great to have people around there. You want someone/something to come to home to every day. I guess that's what was missing. A dog maybe? If I had a pet there, I'd have stayed more. I couldn't ride a scooter until then so I couldn't travel anywhere much. This is when Aakash came, he was there from time to time. Oh god! Aakash you have been an AMAZING AMAZING friend. I have no words. I am so so grateful we met! My birthday was a blast because of you Farha and Khushboo. I still have the Bluetooth speakers you gifted me when I was leaving Goa.

                                           Excited to go to Vagator, Clicked in  Alto Porvorim

                                                                A Bougainvillea in Siolim

                     My first room in Porvorim for a few days before I shifted to Assagao

An empty field in Uccassaim, Bardez

Your first internship teaches you a lot. Well obviously, mine wasn't a piece of cake. Everyone was spellbound and shocked after I told them about me moving out and shifting to Goa. I still have no idea why. I mean isn't this the age to get out of the comfort zone and start living? I am doing the same. So there is no "Why?" or "What?" or "When?". It's NOW! For a guy like Sephi; I got another mentor. Sephi lived in Tel Aviv, New York and later Delhi from 2002 and later moved to Goa.

                                         
                                               My favourite drink Mojito and Anjuna Beach

My initial work place

Sephi just arrived with the twins greeting him. Eva & Amber are ADORABLE!

     I loved how simple Sephi and his family lived in Goa. They had some amazing simplest interiors.

                                       SILK PHOTOS OFFICE, ASSAGAO, NORTH GOA
                              (The final work space after renovation)

I learnt so many recipes due to Shefi (Sephi's wife), our cutest cook Ozie (Elizabeth) who made world's best food and then Mitoo who used to come to clean the house. All a cute bunch of adorable people! I have been fond of Israel for quite sometime now, this added a flavour to it! 

                                                     
                                                      VAGATOR BEACH, NORTH GOA

                                                                    VAGATOR

   
I had a housekeeper at my villa who had three children. And look what all fun I had!

I have no idea what was so exciting on the other side of the wall, but children sure are always curious!

                                   We found my sister Avanti's doppelganger okay!

ANJUNA

Rocky Beach, Behind Fort Aguada

                                                                 ANJUNA

                                                       
                                                          AN EVENING AT ARAMBOL

     

           
                                                               ROCKY BEACH

                                       


I am quite lucky to have found an adorable set of family who always supports me every single time. I guess, whatever I am today is because of them and most importantly, my inspiration, no matter how much we fight, my mother Vaishali. I love you, Aayu! :) 

I cannot even begin to tell you the number of times I have cribbed about coming back to Mumbai but she didn't let me. She has always inspired and encouraged me. At the end of every heart break I have ever had; not just romantic relationships, but any relationship, any problem, my family always stands tall by my side.
So thank you ! I owe you guys a lot!

                                MUST VISIT RESTAURANTS AND MY FAVOURITES: 

1. RITZ CLASSIK

2. VINAYAK RESTAURANT, ASSAGAO

3. ARTJUNA, ANJUNA

4. KOKNI KANTEEN, PANJIM

THE FIGUEIREDO MANSION

Built in 1590, the Figueiredo Mansion pre-dates the Taj Mahal by decades. It was designed by Jesuit priests from nearby Rachol Seminary to accommodate a newly-converted Goan family - the Podiars, who took the name Figueiredo.

The house's sumptuous interior stands in studied contrast to the natural beauty of the paddy fields and coconut trees that surround it.

In the 18th century, with the family's rise in power, the house was suitably augmented to achieve its current proportions. The addition is still known as the "New house".

Every interior was planned out in detail, using the finest components from across the world:

• The floor tiles were imported from Italy and arranged in intricate mosaics.
• The Ballroom and the Dining Room floors are solid teak wood.
• The chandeliers and sconces are made from Belgian Crystal.
• Most of the fine porcelain was sourced from China and Japan.
• There is an East India set made to the family's own design - with no other in the world.
• The leather-upholstered chairs were imported from Portugal.
• The carved wooden furniture was made in Goa by Hindu, Muslim and Christian workers.

THE FIGUEIREDO FAMILY

The Podiars were powerful Saraswat Brahmins who relocated from their native Sancoale in the 16th century, due to an outbreak of bubonic plague.
One part of the family settled in Shiroda, while the other moved to Loutulim and embraced Christianity, taking the surname Figueiredo.

• The founder of the Loutulim branch was Manuel Vicente de Figueiredo. His descendant Vicente João de Figueiredo, a lawyer, built the new part of the house in the eighteenth century. His descendent, also Vicente João de Figueiredo, was a Lawyer, Judge in Ponda, a businessman and a member of The Portuguese Legislative Assembly.


• Georgina Natália Filomena de Figueiredo, his daughter, practised law in Bombay and became the 1st Lady Judge of India. She returned to Goa by her father's request to run the house and Estate, and became a Member of the Legislative Assembly in Goa.


• Maria de Lourdes Figueiredo de Albuquerque, the youngest daughter and now the owner, became the first - and youngest - lady Member of Portuguese Parliament. She returned to Goa after 60 years abroad to maintain this house and to open it as a Museum in 2010.


• Maria de Fátima Figueiredo de Albuquerque, her daughter, has also returned to Goa after decades abroad as an international executive, and has helped restore the house to its original splendour.


• The family also counts a number of diplomats, ambassadors and administrators amongst their ranks. In the 19th century their prestige was such that the King of Portugal granted them a coat of arms.

                    
                            A day in the Panjim Local Market

                                                   KOKNI KANTEEN, PANJIM
                                 (My favourite after Vinayak Restaurant, Assagao)
                                   Order a fish thali if you are a lover of Sea food!

                               People Tree, A beautiful place to visit in Assagao




Biding goodbye to Goa!

Return Journey to Mumbai from Dabolim Airport

Thank you Mayur Gaonkar for helping me and being a wonderful friend for 4 months. Pranav Murdeshwar, it was lovely spending time with you man! I had lots of fun with you. I hope to see you guys super soon! Mayur, you are an amazing host. Pranav, thank you for giving me the films; they saved me hahahaha!



Last but importantly; thank you to my lovely Mumbai clan: 
Gaurav Phatak, Aditya Patkar, Ameya Daphalapurkar, Aakash Shete, Avanti Devdikar, Aishwarya Patil, Preeti Shirodkar, Sayli Patankar, Aniket Deodhar, Hariprasad Jog, Roopak Garbhe, Kshitij Bhide, Prathamesh Rege, Parimal Deshmukh, Aishwarya Khamkar, my parents. You adorable bunch of people made my stay memorable even though so many miles away!

Once again;
Thank you Aakash Ohol for being an absolute amazing friend to me, I will always cherish our friendship; you know I will. Farha & Khushboo for being the cutest fraaands ever! Love you 3!
Thank you Hopping Frog! I love your dog Boyka and still miss him so much! Tashi, Rashida, Sonali, Mohit, Clyde, Charlie and Sharon. So glad to have met you all!



And of course last but not the least; to my mentors:
Shailesh Dias, you wonderful person and mentor. I cannot thank you enough.
Sephi and Shefi Bergerson; I loved each and every moment of my time spent with you guys, I love my name "Little Unicorn" I still miss you calling me that!
Maruska Fernandes; you beautiful human being! Lots of love!
Varuna Sondhi; for being an amazing sister and a great mentor.


You all have given me some delightful memories to remember for life.

  
  Thank you to my readers for inspiring me to keep writing down my thoughts here :)
                     Keep reading and writing! I hope you like the blog !